When People Are Tough to Love | Ryan Wekenman | Sermon Notes — Hello Pastor

Sermon Notes

When People Are Tough to Love

Red Rocks Church • Jun 28, 2026 • 40 min

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Take this message with you through a journey of Scripture, reflection, and prayer.

Summary

In this final message of the Summer Love series, Pastor Ryan Wekenman addresses how believers can love people who are tough to love. By looking at how Jesus interacted with His disciples at the Last Supper, three essential truths emerge: recognizing that we ourselves are hard to love, remembering that everyone is fighting a hidden battle, and anchoring our hearts in the fact that Jesus loved us first. Ultimately, healthy horizontal relationships are only possible when we keep our vertical relationship with God first.

Themes

Loving Difficult PeopleGrace and ForgivenessSelf-Awareness and HumilityEmpathy and BackstoriesVertical Relationship with God

Pastor's Points

1.

1. You are tough to love.

2.

2. Everyone is fighting a battle.

3.

3. Jesus went first.

Key Points

1.
You are tough to love, so loving difficult people begins with recognizing our own flaws and complications.
2.
Everyone is fighting a battle, meaning behind every difficult behavior lies a personal backstory that requires empathy.
3.
Jesus went first, demonstrating ultimate love by dying on the cross for us while we were still sinners.
4.
Horizontal relationships with people only work when we maintain a priority on our vertical relationship with God.
5.
Jesus taught in Matthew 7:3 that we should stop obsessing over the speck in someone else's eye while overlooking the log in our own.
6.
Although tax collectors were hated traitors in the first century, Jesus saw Matthew's potential and transformed his life.
7.
Gratitude transforms how we treat difficult people when we stop complaining about what they lack and focus on what they offer.

Sermon Moments

“The only shot we have at those horizontal relationships working is to get back to remembering our vertical relationship with God.”

“Step one in loving people who are tough to love: You are tough to love. I am tough to love.”

“Every single person that you meet is fighting a battle, and there is a backstory to every behavior.”

“Jesus went first. We are only able to love because Christ first loved us while we were still sinners.”

“When it comes to loving people who are tough to love, gratitude goes a long way—start being grateful for the qualities they do have.”

“Jesus didn't just see what was, he saw what could be.”

This Week

Prioritize your vertical relationship with God through prayer and worship so you have the spiritual strength to handle horizontal relationships.

Cultivate self-awareness by acknowledging your own flaws and complications before being quick to criticize others.

Practice empathy with difficult people by remembering that everyone has a backstory and is fighting hidden battles.

Stop waiting for others to clean up their lives or fix themselves before extending Christlike grace and acceptance to them.

Choose gratitude over criticism by focusing on the positive qualities people have rather than complaining about what they lack.

Look past present faults in people to see their God-given potential and purpose, just as Jesus did with Matthew.

If you are single, resist apathy and frustration by choosing selflessness and leading out in service to God and your community.

Remember This

We are empowered to love difficult people only when we remember our vertical relationship with God and realize that Jesus loved us first when we were tough to love.

A Challenge for You

The only shot we have at those horizontal relationships working is to get back to remembering our vertical relationship with God. Love God with all your soul, with all your heart, with all your strength, and then you will find the strength to love your neighbor as yourself.

These are personal sermon notes shared to help you remember the message — not a replacement for Scripture, your church, or your pastors.